I Take Good Care of Myself. I’m also a Mess right now.
Right now, my body is in what I call a "flare up." For me, flare ups come in different flavors — gut, wrist, autoimmune, sleep. Currently, all of these are firing at once. So let's talk about it.
GI issues have been a companion since I was little — stress goes straight to my gut. A stretch of four surgeries between 2017 and 2023 added layers: bacterial overgrowth, food sensitivities, and eventually reflux that showed up last summer and hasn't fully left. The irony is that treating one thing can aggravate another.
The GI stuff has been wrecking my sleep, and a tired body has very little patience for healing.
Then yesterday I went on a walk and held my water bottle the wrong way and now a nerve in my wrist is all flared up and painful.
All of this has been a reminder that the body isn't a machine with separate parts — it's an ecosystem, and healing is rarely linear.
I share all of this not for sympathy. I share it because shiz happens in these bodies. Being human is rough sometimes. And it's not only the personal — it's also our shared, collective pain. As someone who feels everything deeply, the world right now is a lot.
So I’ve Been leaning On What I Know
I have a mantra: My body knows how to heal. I know how to take care. I've had a fair amount of physical suffering, and after many bouts like this, I have a lot of evidence that this too shall pass. I know what to do when I'm having a flare up.
I used to think I was weak when flare ups happened. Now I shamelessly rest, cancel plans and say no to invitations until I'm back on my feet.
Everything goes back to basics. Simple food, extra water, pared down schedule, strict nighttime routine to optimize sleep. No sense in pretending it's business as usual. It's not.
Look for glimmers. Holding the tension of "yes, it's hard right now and there is also beauty happening" is a practice that helps widen the world out from the tunnel of pain. A big glimmer right now is Artemis II.
Show up... modified. I came to the workout class this morning with a wrist brace and did mostly body weight exercises. Being with everyone boosted my spirits. Moving gave me some happy hormones. When I'm honest with myself about how I'm doing, my choices can be supportive rather than depleting.
Everyone has their thing. The body they have to work with, not against. The lessons they get, often over and over. On a trek in the Himalayas — yes, while passing a kidney stone — I looked around at the women I was with and saw it clearly: one's knees, one's vision, one's cancer aftermath. We all carry something. The practice isn't escaping it. It's learning what you're made of when you're in it.
With love and Aspercreme,
— Michelle
Michelle Marlahan has been teaching yoga since 2001 and is the founder of It's All Yoga. She teaches from her home in West Sacramento, alongside her cat Magic and her dog Maple.