Unsupportive Resources
If you recognize that your main resources are unhealthy or harmful, like social media, video games, alcohol or other substances, here are a few things to consider.
First, know that it's totally normal to self-regulate! You aren't bad because you utilize a way of regulating that also isn't good for you. It's working in some way or you wouldn't do it.
The good news is there's something to be learned from the activity or substance. There's an effect of self regulation that is important and useful.
What are the qualities of that?
How do you feel when engaging with that "resource"?
Do you feel relaxed?
Present?
Engaged?
Start to notice, even look for, times and activities where you feel that quality outside of that activity/substance. You can even practice feeling that quality without the "thing."
Take the effect of the self regulation attempt and practice it separate from the unhealthy or harmful activity or substance.
It's quite simplistic to talk about replacing an unhealthy resource just by noticing what it gives you or inserting a more helpful resource. However, when we do this with complete awareness of the body and what's happening in the physiology, the effects can be profound.
Of course, substitutions probably won't feel exactly the same and making any kind of habit change takes work. But bringing in the body aspect and tracking the felt-sense experience will help make that shift with more honestly, awareness and nervous system support.
If you haven't already, check the post on ideas on identifying more positive resources.
*If you have an addiction or need clinical support, please seek out a therapist or treatment program for support and loving care.
Michelle Marlahan
Where Self Care becomes Soul Care
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